Operator Log

1,340 operator calls resulted in 19 log entries by three operators in 2023. A few boring ones are not included.

• 2023-02-10 Caller said they were wondering what the next step was. I told them they could do whatever they wanted.
• 2023-02-23 Caller asked where the concentration camp option went. I told them it was in the directory. Caller confirmed that the chair was still there, they were sitting in it. Caller told me a long story about hot cops rolling up on their child who was in the car while they were on the phone, and then asking what it was about.
• 2023-03-01 Caller asked if I knew who they could call to find out the likelihood of a meteor. I told them I wasn’t sure - they said ok thank you and hung up in seemingly good spirits.
• 2023-04-08 Caller told me that the phone said to press 0 for the operator, was I an operator? Yes. Caller asked what could I do, did I have resources? Yes. Caller told me they were homeless and aimless after their wife overdosed. I said that I was sorry that I couldn’t provide therapy. Caller said that’s good because they didn’t want that, ha ha. Caller had me look up their wife’s mother’s number in Utah. I told them a possible match.
• 2023-05-13 Caller wanted to know the weather report. I gave a recitation from weather.gov.
• 2023-05-17 Silence, and just the tiniest faint sound of breathing? I said only “hello?” instead of “hello futel operator?” For a good two minutes I was convinced someone was there, listening to everything I said. I didn’t say much. I talked about the weather a little. Whenever I was sure there was nothing at all on the line here would be one more little tiny glimpse, or fragment of what sounded like a human voice. Maybe it was just a voice compression algorithm artifact. But I was just imagining a kind of an older guy may be in bed somewhere maybe needing help? Probably I am just projecting. Eventually i said to dial the operator again if they still need assistance, and i hung up.
• 2023-05-20 Caller asked how to make a call, I told them to dial 1.
• 2023-05-23 Caller was just making sure the phone works.
• 2023-05-24 Caller needed the number for the StoneCrest Center. However, caller really struggled to correctly differentiate between the numbers 1 and 4. Eventually they got a pencil, but even writing it down did not help as much as you’d think. But we got it eventually.
• 2023-05-24 Caller asked how to use the voicemail, I told them to dial 2 and create a voicemail box. Caller asked how someone would leave a voicemail, I told them they should choose voicemail from any Futel phone or the incoming line. Caller was confused about the incoming line and asked if that was the main Futel phone, I told them that they could call it from any phone. Caller asked if we listened to calls, I told them no. Caller asked if there was a policy about that or any way to verify it, why should they trust me? I told them that they should take whatever precautions they thought necessary, and also reminded them that we don’t listen to their calls, but somebody else could be. Caller thanked me for providing the service.
• 2023-06-22 Caller asked why their call didn’t work, they told me the number but I couldn’t tell why it didn’t work, I told them to try again, maybe it was congestion.
• 2025-07-03 Caller asked who I was, I told them that they called the operator and to call back if they needed one.
• 2023-07-30 Caller gave name of Wickum, said its a blessed beautiful day, wanted 1) to know what “this” is (i asked them to hold the item up to the telephone), 2) to find a beautiful white woman who wants some big black cock (i told them futel operators were probably not interested, but i wished them luck overall & promised to log their request).
• 2023-08-06 You’re going to need to hang up and dial your number again, my friend.
• 2023-08-15 Six minute conversation with a person who may have been high or may have been experiencing time in a different direction, I suggest that because there were also some strange rhythmic sounds and spectral noises.
• 2023-11-11 Caller asked for the phone number of the phone they were using, which I provided.
• 2023-11-12 Callers asked my what my favorite band was, I replied with the Butthole Surfers and hung up.
• 2023-11-14 Caller wasn’t able to make a call, I asked them if they tried at the dial tone. What’s a dial tone? Does it go beep beep beep or is it long? I told them to listen for it after pressing one.
• 2023-11-14 Caller having trouble dialing a Virginia number. I got a detailed description & i’m not sure they did anything wrong at all. I just suggested they try again & call back if not going through.